Archive for the ‘Thought Provoking’ Category

Wheat- Dangerous and Unhealthy?

Sunday, January 15th, 2012

Listen, I know you are not going to believe this, because I don’t. But I must tell you because it is my obligation to share with you things as I learn them. So here it goes…

Wheat is not good for you!

I was talking to a young lady a few days ago. She was telling me that she was going to be doing a class on health. And of course I am always looking for ways to be more healthy. So, I listened. She started talking about some of the diseases we have seen spiked in recent decades- heart disease, diabetes, colon cancer, etc. Her next statement made my jaw drop. “Those things are all caused by the wheat we currently eat.”

What?

That’s right! What the so called nutritionists and health professionals have been telling us to eat more of is actually what is causing our poor health. No way! Yes way!

The author of Wheat Belly, William Davis, actually breaks down this reality. He is a practicing cardiologist. He explains how he slipped up on the wheat revelation accidentally while recommending some healthier living habits to his patients.

He talks about after suggesting some of his patients remove wheat from their diets for 90 days to see if that made a difference, that upon their next visit, those patients weighed 20, 30, and 50 lbs less. They were now diabetes-free, asthma was all but gone, and they had more energy. Of course, this caused the doctor to launch head first into a wheat research, and he found more than he was looking for. He discusses all of this information and more in Wheat Belly.

Do yourself a favor, pick up the book today. It is eye-opening and amazing. I am sold and will remove wheat from my life starting today.

* If you made a New Year’s Resolution to lose those unwanted pounds and maybe some belly fat, a wheat-less diet may be your answer. Get the book and you will see what I mean.

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Anti-Social

Friday, December 9th, 2011

Who Cares?

Why do we waste so much time watching T.V. shows that specialize in looking into celebrities’ personal lives?

Who cares that Kim Kardashian got married, and divorced all before the season of her tv show ended? What will they do next season? How about for next season, she can get a divorce before she even gets married?

So what, Justin Bieber is on vacation with his girlfriend? No Bieber fever here.

Alec Baldwin was kicked off a plane. Really? Was he the first person ever to get kicked off? Let’s talk about those who never got on.

J Lo has separated from Mark Anthony and is dating a 24 year old dancer. Oh well, she loves dancing and she loves younger dancers! Whoop de do!

So what. So what! So what!!!

Here’s my point…We really don’t care and should we? These people are entertainers (some good and some not), but the truth is that while we pay attention (sometimes too much), we don’t really care.

There are more things, more important things, to be concerned about other than a celebrity and his/her personal life. We have our own personal lives to be concerned. Most times, they are personal lives that are not that  glamorous and even worse than those of the so called celebrities.

The sad thing about it is that while we are watching what is going on in their personal lives, they are getting richer and our lives are getting worse.

Isn’t it time for us to mind our “own” business? Isn’t it time for us to spend 25% of the time figuring out what is wrong with us and 75% of the time trying to fix it? That would leave zero time to worry, pay attention to, or be concerned about someone we know very little about. Enough already.

Going to read a book.

 

 

 

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It’s Your Gift, Now Use It?

Tuesday, August 2nd, 2011

I am so amazed, now, that I realize how much time people spend trying to perfect things they are not good at!

 

I mean if you are good at something, why not perfect that and become better. Most of the time, the very thing that you are good at takes little or no effort and is virtually stress-less. The very thing that you are good at will likely be the thing that will bring you wealth, prosperity, and peace.

A famous proverb says “A man’s gift will make room for him and will place him before great kings.”

Contrary to popular belief, one shouldn’t waste time on “trying” to get better at something they are not good at. If you can’t sing, then why waste years trying to become a great singer?

Most people, if they were honest with you, can attest that they have spent years attempting to do something they were not good at. Wasted time.

One man said it like this, “perfect what you are good at and contain what you are not”.

When you realize your success is locked up in your talent, then you will stop chasing empty dreams around and start living the life that you were destined to live.

Do what you are good at doing and your life will become that much more enjoyable.

 

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The Problem With Ted Williams ‘Golden Voice’

Monday, January 24th, 2011

I just read that Ted Williams left rehab. That news was accompanied by hundreds of people who knew it wouldn’t last, considered Ted hopeless from the beginning, and almost gloated in the fact that they knew it was bound to happen. Others are surprised by Ted’s actions and can’t understand what happened. But it is really very simple.

What’s the problem with Ted Williams? It is too much. He has what I call mental whiplash. What is whiplash? It’s when several things happen all at once and the receiver is not capable, or shall I say prepared, to handle those things. So, he feels paralyzed. He doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t know what to think. He doesn’t know where to go. He is paralyzed. It is too much for him to handle- right now.

Let’s go through the stages. Here you have a homeless man. He is either a crack addict or was a crack addict. And he is an alcoholic. These are all issues- life changing issues. So, Ted is a middle aged man filled with issues/problems. After years of learning how to survive on the street, he gets a lucky break. Someone sees him and gives him the opportunity to show off his gift- the golden voice. After he gives them a taste of his million dollar voice, they are shocked. Stunned. Like you and I, they had to be thinking what anyone else would have thought. What in the world is a person this gifted doing homeless? Unable to figure this impossible question out, they feel the need to do what any other good hearted person would do. Help. So, they take the video and put it onto Youtube hoping not only to show millions of people the gift of this fascinating voice but to also somehow or someway see if he can get a lucky break. He does.

Before long, this homeless man with issues/problems is now being offered opportunities. Things that only you and I can dream of. Calls from Mr. Trump. Calls from Kraft. Calls from the Cleveland Cavaliers and many, many  more. Finally, his problems are solved, right? Wrong.

In spite of all the offers and lucky breaks, what people fail to realize is that beyond this ‘golden voice’ is a broken man with problems, a man with issues. Those issues and problems have been some of the things that has led him to where he is in life today- homeless. In order for Ted Williams to rebound after a life of hard  knocks and hard times, he has to deal with the very issues that caused him to be where he is. Those things are what make him, him. They are on the inside. The job offers, opportunities, and overnight good fortune are external. They do not change the inside.

The problem with getting only external changes is the internal remains the same- broken. A person has the potential to implode. And this is what is happening to the golden voice. The pressure of everything from the outside is causing his weak inside to collapse.

The solution, not just for Mr. Williams but for the rest of the world…During the quiet times in your life, the times when nothing is going right, the times where you may feel in the dumps, and you find yourself all but forgotten by society- that is the perfect time to work on you. Work on building your character. Deal with your issues and shortcomings. And do whatever it takes to become stable, solid and well-grounded as a person. Those quiet times, slow periods, and low days are needed but they don’t last always. One day, the world will pull up to your corner and say “let us see what you have”. It is then when we want you to explode with success and not implode with problems.

Get well Mr. Ted Williams. We look forward to not only hearing “the Golden Voice” again, but also seeing the wonderful man who owns it. 

Ray L. Owensby

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Your Last New Year’s Resolution

Saturday, January 1st, 2011

New Year’s Resolutions. We all make them because on December 31st we are coming into a new year and it is just the norm to set new goals, new hopes, and new aspirations. Besides, if last year wasn’t very good- who wants to repeat it? So, we throw out big dreams, yell out outrageous desires, and write down impossible goals. Only to dismiss them and forget about them before the end of February. Why? Why do we go through the hoopla of this tradition year after year when they don’t come to pass? If resolutions don’t work, why do we go through the motions every year?

Before we talk about why resolutions don’t work and discuss a better alternative that works 80% better, Let’s look at the 10 most common resolutions.

10 Most common New Year’s Resolutions:

  1.  Weight Loss
  2.  Exercise
  3.  Stop Smoking
  4.  Eat Right
  5.  Stop Procrastinating
  6.  Save Money
  7.  Reduce stress
  8.  Get better job
  9.  Manage debt
  10.  Get better education

 

Did you see one of your 2011 resolutions there? Here’s a better question, did you have one of these as your 2010 resolution? Here is the ultimate question, did you accomplish your 2010 resolution? If not, don’t feel bad. Most didn’t. So, why do we continue to make resolutions year after year and never accomplish what we said we would at the beginning of each year? Here’s the answer, New year’s resolutions are not supposed to be accomplished? Does that surprise you? Let me explain.

The word resolution means “a formal determination”. To determine means to proclaim, hope or desire. In other words, a resolution is nothing more than a wish. You wish to lose weight. You wish to save money. You wish to get a better job. However, when one wishes and adds no action to them, they are only dreaming. What happens when you wake up from dreaming, usually nothing. So it is in the month of February. After the newness of New Years have worn off and the commonality and the familiar begins to settle in, you wake up from your dreams- and nothing happens. Everything that you resoluted (wished) to do has fallen by the wayside and you find the familiar footsteps of yester-year and start the routine all over again. Is there a better way? You bet.

First of all, we have to get rid of the word “resolution”. Like we mentioned before, resolutions are nothing more than dreams. So, what word can we use to replace resolution? It has to be something that speaks “action” and not merely about dreaming. How about achievements, acts, fulfillments, or accomplishments. All these words speak of action. Not only that, but they speak of something that has already been completed and not something you wish to complete. That makes a world of difference. For the sake of this discussion, I will use the word “acts”.

So, how do we get our New Year’s Acts to work? I am glad you asked. There are three things that must happen in order to fulfill the acts you have established at the beginning of the year:

  1.  Have something to accomplish
  2.  Map out what you want to accomplish
  3.  Set achievable dates

 

For the most part, we get step number one right. We know what we want to accomplish or achieve. We want to lose weight. We want to go back to school. We want to get a better job. We want to de-stress our lives. However, this is where we stop and ultimately the reason our plans- FAIL.

The second part is important. You have to dissect or breakdown in smaller pieces what you want to accomplish. For example, if you want to lose 30 pounds by June, you have to lose 5 lbs a month. You have to change your exercise schedule monthly. You also have to change what you eat or don’t eat per month. That may sound difficult, but it is really simple. Is it easier to lose 5 lbs or 30 lbs? Well, 5 is the correct answer. If I asked you could you lose 5 lbs, you would probably say “of course”. So the key is losing 5 lbs in Jan, losing 5 in Feb, then in March and so on. You may also want to change one exercise routine in Jan, then add another in Feb, then another in March. Same with your eating habits. Change one habit in Jan, then another in Feb, then one in March and so on. Before long, you will be in the month of June minus the 30 lbs you started with. You heard the saying, how do you eat an elephant- one bite at a time. That is so true in many ways.

Thirdly, you have to set achievable dates. A person who sets dates will achieve 50-80% more than someone who doesn’t. Dates don’t have to be too specific or too broad. One lady who was trying to stop smoking said that every 15 days, she would smoke 1 cigarette less from her average cigarette daily routine. Simply put, she started out smoking 10 cigarettes a day. Every 15 days, she cut out one cigarrette. By the end of  May, she was down to only one cigarette a day. By June 15th, she stopped smoking altogether. Setting dates is very important. Not setting dates is what keeps your desires in the “dream” arena and away from the “action” one. 

There you have it. If you want to do more than dream this year and greatly desire to see changes in your life, follow the three steps listed above. They will get you to where you want to get to. Fortunately, these are also universal steps. In other words, they will not just work for the beginning of the year but if you apply them in any other area in your life, they will work there too.

Remember, no more resolutions. Call them New Year’s Acts or something that amplifies that action is taking place and that you are not just dreaming. When you do that, you will see results.

 

 

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It Hurts- Good!

Thursday, December 23rd, 2010

When I was younger, I remember something called castor oil. It was a type of medicine that came in the form of a thick oil. It was horrible to taste and extremely hard to swallow. Whenever someone would get sick, mom or dad would head to the medicine cabinet to grab the castor oil. The bad thing is that not only the did the “sick” person have to take the castor oil but everyone in the family had to. It was torture, but for some reason adults believed that it would make you well no matter what the illness. Kids weren’t too sure.

There are other ointments and natural cure-alls that were used “back in the day” to make us feel better. For the most part, many of them made you feel worse before they made you feel better. I believe life is like that.

Sometimes when we are going through tough times, things seem to get worse before they get better. This is not abnormal. This is what I call “life’s castor oil.”  Life seems to wait awhile before bringing good things our way or before turning our misfortunes around. So, no matter how bad life “tastes” at times. Remember, it sometimes gets worse before it get better. BUT, it will get better. Hang in there!

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Now=Won

Saturday, December 4th, 2010

I once heard someone say “you can’t change yesterday and you have no control over tomorrow.”

 Think about that for a second. You can’t change yesterday. Now how many people spend their lives trying to change their yesterdays? Face it, we have all made bad decisions and poor choices. Sometimes we lament over those decisions. Sometimes we cry and stress over those decisions. But guess what? We can’t change what we “did”.  Sadly, those choices gravely affect our tomorrows.

On the same token, think about tomorrow. Think about what you want to change about tomorrow. Now, think really hard and make it happen. Nothing. Okay I will give you a few more minutes. Still Nothing. Alright, let me save you some time. You can plan for, wish for, hope for, or do whatever you want but tomorrow has a mind of its own. You can’t change it.

 Today (Now) is different. You can make a difference  by what you do today. Today, you can make the right choice. Today you can choose to do the right things. Today is the time to plant good seeds for a better tomorrow. Today is all you have. Learn from your yesterdays. Prepare for your tomorrows. However, make the most of your todays.

Today is symbolic to your “nows”. What can you do now? What can you say now? Where can you go now? How can you take advantage of your now? If you want to make a better tomorrow and if you want to be happy about your yesterdays- “Now” is the time to do what you need to do to make that happen.

When you take advantage of your “nows”, you will notice the possibility of you winning in life, greatly increases. So, living in the now is not an option if you want to have a wonderful life. It is a necessity. 

If you live in the “now”, when you look back at your yesterdays- You will realize that you have “won”.  (Now spelled backwards is Won)

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The Answer to Every Problem

Saturday, November 27th, 2010

Have you ever encountered a problem and didn’t know how to deal with it? We all have at one time or another. Something right out of the blue hit us, and we were facing a situation that we had absolutely no idea of how to deal with it. So, how did we deal with it? Most times, we ran away from them, hid from them, and even tried to ignore them. Did they go away? Most times they didn’t.

I am a firm believer that every problem has a solution. We may not know the solution at the time the problem arises, but there is a solution.

So, how should we deal with problems we don’t know the solution to?

Before I tell you that, let me say one thing. I believe the earth has everything it needs to exist. In other words, if the earth doesn’t have it then the earth doesn’t need it. I am often tickled when I hear things like soon the earth will run out of oil or natural gas or something like that. I say “please!” If there is a problem with the earth’s resources or the lack thereof, the solution is nothing external. I mean if the earth runs out of oil, what planet will loan us more? If there is a problem within the earth, the solution is also there.
Think about this for a second. When a sickness attacks the body, it is normally not external medicines that cure us. No, contrary to popular belief, the medicines only allow us to maintain and tolerate the symptoms. It is our bodies and the components within that team together to cure or battle the ailments. Anytime external assistance comes and the components within the body are not functioning properly, the result is still the same- detrimental. The external components may help us last a little longer but usually the solution to every problem in the body, can be found within the body.
So it is with problems. If one takes a look into the problems they are facing, there normally lies the solution. You heard me correct. If you look, I mean really look, into most problems the solution is in the midst of them.
So, my question to you is what is the problem you are facing today? If you look inside the problem and pay close attention to the root, you may just find the solution you are looking for. Just think about if our society would use the same formula. How far do you think we will be as a nation or even as the world. What if the solution to poverty was right inside of poverty itself? What if the solution to divorce was locked up in divorce itself? What if the solution to obesity was right inside of obesity itself? And what if solution/cure for any disease could be found in the disease itself?

Versus running away from problems, I challenge you to look again. The solution is right there.

Inside of Every Problem, Lies the Solution

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Later for Oprah- Finally!

Saturday, November 13th, 2010

I think it’s time to say “Good Bye” to Oprah. Not because this is her show’s final season. Not because she chooses to say Good bye to us, but because…before the season is over, I believe she will help us become a more depressed, unworthy, and hopeless feeling society.

I, like millions of others, was interested in seeing what she would bring to the table during her final season. I have not been much of an Oprah fan since the inception of her show. I thought she male-bashed when she got the opportunity. I also thought that most of the things she did for the community was commercial, meaning if the cameras wasn’t around or if she didn’t have a large audience, her contributions were limited- very limited. However, I occasionally watched the show when she had interesting people on it. Especially those larger than life people, who normally kept their lives secret, but decided to allow the public a glimpse of their world.

Yes, I am not totally against Oprah. I believe that everyone should be allowed to write a “happy” ending to their life’s story regardless of where they start. And Oprah has done just that, but at what cost?

Normally, if the show had something on that I didn’t agree with or if Oprah’s responses and opinions to the guest were twisted and deranged, I would just turn the show off. But I couldn’t do that on October 18th. Her guest was the Playwright/Actor/Movie Director- Tyler Perry. Now, when I first turned the show on, I wasn’t sure what it was about, but I was excited because Mr. Perry was on it and I enjoy hearing about and from people who started out with a rough life but worked their way to a better life. It is inspiring and encouraging to those who are still in the “struggle” of life. Yet, I was unprepared for what I was about to hear.

Tyler commenced to talk about his childhood and how he was molested. He gave graphic details that made me cringe. I could see the pain in his face as if he was re-living the torture again. And though it appeared Oprah was empathizing with him, her continual quest for more details regardless of how Tyler struggled, told me that in the back of Oprah’s mind she was cheering. Not because Tyler was “getting this stuff off of his chest”, but because with every graphic detail, her ratings were shooting through the roof. I was appalled.

First, I was appalled because a person like Tyler, who has encouraged many people to overcome, was now being used and manipulated to increase a hungry stars quest for a “real” finale to increase ratings. There was nothing, and I meaning sincerely nothing, encouraging or uplifting about this show. Don’t get me wrong, I think it is important that people know where they came from and that they share those things with other people, but where do we go from there? Now, that I have shared my life with the world and others could relate, what can I give them to help them make it over? When we leave the “Overcoming” piece off, we add pain along with the original pain. Like adding another tombstone to a grave, we continue to re-live that thing over and over again.

Secondly, I am appalled that Oprah feels the need to use people who look up to her. She uses them for her own selfish reasons. Tyler Perry has mentioned on several occasions that when he was “down and out”, he learned how to keep a journal from one of Oprah’s shows, which he used to create several of his plays. For that reason, he felt indebted to Oprah. Therefore, Oprah could ask him to do anything and he would. Thus, is the reason for the show. Tyler’s indebt-ness helped him agree with the request to bare all. I believe he was convinced to do the show because he was told it would “help” people. The result, a second show with over 200 men “baring all” with similar results- graphic detail and no encouragement, However, this time there was an added benefit- a loud discouraging message to the female population stating that “most” men are broken, hurt, and irreparable. So, don’t expect Mr. Right to come your way anytime soon. Not Good.
At a time like this, when our economy is in turmoil, when the jobless rate is sky-high, and when relationships and people are struggling beyond measure, do we really need another show that adds to our “demise?” Why can’t we do what we can to encourage, help, build up, and support one another? If people say that it is the truth and we need to hear it, we don’t need to pay Oprah for the truth when we can turn on the depressing daily news and get the truth from people who make far less than she does.

So, again, I say Oprah “We’ve had enough”. We don’t need your help to feel more depressed and discouraged while you escape to your many houses or exquisite getaways. We are left stuck mentally drained and struggling to survive our day to day lives. You have made enough money by degrading, putting down, and criticizing us “average” people. Sadly, we have funded you to do so. Well, today, we say ENOUGH. If none of your remaining shows are geared to get unemployed people jobs, if they are not geared towards keeping people from losing their foreclosed homes, if they are not geared towards building people up- you may go. We won’t miss you. We actually hope something helpful will fill your TV spot.

P.S. Just a note to Tyler Perry… Anyone that benefits from your “baring all” without helping you, is not a friend.  So, look around you and make sure you are surrounded by true friends or you may look around you and see people benefitting from your demise. Those are no ”friends”.

Also, please re-focus on bringing movies with an encouraging message back to us, your fans. We enjoy them and that is where you soar.

Enough Oprah

Ray L. Owensby

Obahoo.com

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“Conflict Is GOOD”

Saturday, November 6th, 2010

Many people run away from conflict. It is hard, uncomfortable, a struggle. It goes against the grain. It often leaves one banged up, bruised, and sorrowful. What can I say, conflict is conflict. But, what if conflict isn’t all negative?

Conflict is when something goes against something else. In other words, if one person goes against another, there lies conflict. If one idea contradicts another idea, there is conflict. If you desire more money, but have more bills than you can afford- that’s conflict. When there is a resistance, a contradiction, opposition, or confrontation, conflict is present. So how is it that I say conflict is good?

Without conflict, nothing grows. It is the opposition of a thing that causes another thing to grow. For example, the opposition of heavy weights to a weightlifter causes his muscles to grow. When a seed falls to the ground, the life inside struggles to break the outer shell, the result is a plant. When a caterpillar is tired of crawling and wants to fly, it cocoons itself. As its wings are developing, they struggle within the cocoon. The wings are strong enough to fly, when it can break the cocoon open. The same is true with relationships. If everything in a relationship goes well, when the storm comes the relationship will not be able to survive. It is those minor spats  that build a relationship’s strength so that it could survive the “major” issues.

Conflict may be difficult and hard to accept, but if one endures, he will be able to look back and see how he has grown. If it wasn’t for the problems, difficult situations, and struggles in our lives, would we be the people that we are today? We need not run from conflict, just endure and celebrate after it is over.

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